my fantasy

I spend a lot of my time on-line, listening to my fav music, reading  books

so just wanna let you all know

my writing highly influence and inspired by people around me, the lyrics of the songs I'm listening to & the books I'm reading..

'my fantasy'

Fear knocked at the door. Faith answered. No one was there.....

sometimes you gotta stop worrying and doubting or be scared of anything have not happen yet. All you need is some faith that things will work out. Maybe not how you planned, but how they were meant to be.

When you know your value, that's it.

you will see how much you are worth.

I'm not closing any books, I just turning the page to begin a new chapter.

I've try to close one before, but trust me, you will never succeed coz 'past' is also yours. There'd be no now if wasn't the past. So what I am doing right now is move along with it coz the past makes the better me today.

I am so grateful having big-fat-heart people in my life who always try to lift me up day by day.

all I need to do is to keep remind myself to it

'past' never got very far, I'm putting some defences, walls up

to make sure I guarded my heart 

and I ever promised I wouldn't do this

until I knew it was right for me

but....

my fantasy

I knew you noticed that I lose my focus, coz...

I've never felt nothing like this before

you're making me so open up, no point even trying to fight this

It kinda feels like it's love

is it ?

people said, if you about to love someone, you naturally expect a little care from them.

huhu, is it true? well, I guess I should take the chances, in fact, takes a loooottttt fo them..hehe

be brave to step up !

Bcoz honestly, no matter where you end up and with whom, it always ends up just the way it should be. Your mistakes make you who you are, you learn and grow with each choice you make. Everything is worth it. Say how you feel, always. Be you and be OK with it.

Everyday Allah showed me one by one, something I couldn't understand before, but I can understand now. How Amazing HIS planning and HIS will. Beyond what I ever thought before.

I am writing and sharing this, hoping everyone will stay strong even how big or how serious your state of life now, don't ever give up. Allah never ask you to start thinking and depressing your brain thinking of the solution of your problem, Allah only ask you to calm down, be patience and tell Him all your hardship, He just wanna hear you asking from Him. He definitely will help you.

problems are like washing machines, they twist, they spin, they knock us around..but in the end, we come out cleaner, brighter and better than before...InsyaAllah.

love,

A.J 

and the end of the day (akhirnya)....

"Akhirnya...

aku cuma mahu jadi orang biasa

masak makanan kegemaran kita

sterika baju kau sebelum pergi kerja

mandi dan susukan cinta hati kita

tidur beralas lengan kamu sampai bila-bila"

Namun...

ada perkara yang ingin kita buang jauh-jauh

kita lemparkan ke hujung dunia

kita hapuskan dari minda dan ingatan

bukan kerana kita membenci

tetapi kerana menyedari jika kita mengingatinya

hanya membuat kita terikat kepada sebuah kesedihan jika terus menyimpannya

hanya membuat kita terkaku pada sebuah angan-angan

bukan membenci, bukan berputus asa

cuma sedar dan faham

ada sesetengah perkara

memang bukan hak kita

menjauhi bukanlah bermakna membenci

cuma untuk mengelakkan hati dari terus terguris dan disakiti

Tidak Semestinya Apa Yang Kita Suka Baik Untuk Kita, Begitu Juga Dengan Apa Yang Kita Tak Suka Adalah Buruk Untuk Kita. Hidup Sentiasa Menjanjikan Sesuatu Yang Luar Jangkaan. Luar Batasan Akal. Yang Pasti Hidup Sentiasa Berdepan Dengan Cabaran Yang Bukan Sedikit. Cabaran Itulah Yang Buat Kita Lemah. Dan Dari Lemah Kita Perlahan-lahan Mendaki Kekuatan.

Walaupun Dengan Tangisan Tidak Mampu Menyelesaikan Apa-apa Masalah Tapi Kadangkala Air Mata Yang Jatuh Itu Membuat Kita Cukup Kuat Untuk Bangkit Kembali.

when I sad, these words help me get through the sadness....

Kita Bangun Setiap Pagi Dengan Harapan Hari Itu Akan Menjadi Lebih Baik Dari Semalam, Tetapi Kemudian ALLAH Menguji Lagi, Kita Pun Kecewa Dan Harapan Kita Seolah-Olah Sudah Hilang.

JANGAN SEDIH

Selagi Kita Bernafas Hari Itu,

Selagi Itulah Masih Ada Harapan.

Ruang dan Peluang Untuk Membetulkan Keadaan.

Yang Penting, Jangan Sesekali Putus Asa Dengan Kasih Sayang Dan Rahmat ALLAH.

"your mind is a powerful thing, when you fill it with positive thoughts, your life will start to change"

Selalu Ingat Yang ALLAH Mungkin Nak Beri Kesenangan Yang Lebih Ke Depan. Dia Minta Kita Ingat Dia Di Saat Kita Susah Kerana Ada Ganjaran Yang Nak Di Beri Di Masa Hadapan. 

Jangan Merungut Dengan ALLAH Kerana ALLAH Juga Tidak Pernah Merungut Akan Sikap Kita.

"rabbi yassir wala tu 'assir, rabbi tammim bil khoir"

Ya ALLAH Permudahkanlah Segala Urusan, Janganlah Engkau Persulitkannya

Sempurnakanlah Dengan Kebaikan

~bertemu denganmu adalah takdir

~berkawan denganmu adalah pilihan

~bersahabat denganmu adalah kesempatan

~bersaudara denganmu adalah kebahagian

~semoga persahabatan kita akan tetap terjaga selamanya

xoxo

A.J

a little light of.......

someone said to me

"blog jangan lah sedih2"

"wat la happy story plak"

never thought that person notice my blog before
just know about it recently

haha
btw I'm not doing it with intent

just did it

maybe I wasn't that happy

so turn out to be sad or emotional entry

my bad

I guess now seems I got a little light of hope and love

so I start with changing this blog tune

no more 'talking to the moon.....'

haha

Mirror by Justin Timberlake

great lyrics

deep words

kinda jamming my heart perfectly

hoping that I successfully change the mood

taking away the gloomy

haha

xoxo,

A.J

till we meet again

we can deny it as much as we want

but in time our feeling will show

#almostneverenough

till we meet again

may our troubles be few

hoping life's good to us

 may our heart beat steady and strong

I wish you the best

may we find happiness in every step we're on

1001 rasa

Assalamualaikum,

suka suka Ain je  kan nak update blog taknak update blog

haha, biasa lah tu

one more thing, sorry kalau lagu ni mem'bising'kan segenap ruang bilik korang..love that song so much, playing it everyday..get her new album okay !

so......

apa yang 1001 rasa tu??

it's normal I guess for someone like me

I mean who still umemployed, staying at home

macam macam perasaan boleh datang

yang baik Alhamdulillah

yang tak baik ni la yang menyiksa jiwa dan raga Ain

tak suke...

jahat betul syaitan ni, suka suntik yang tak elok

zikir kena selalu menitip di bibir (betul ke tatabahasa aku nih,haha)

insyaAllah kalau kita selalu ingat Allah,

kekuatan tu akan datang dengan sendirinya

kalau manusia luka kan hati kita

jangan bersedih, doa dengan Allah, mintak dengan Allah

kan Allah pencipta hati kita

kita mintak Allah jaga hati kita

yakin yang Allah sentiasa ada dan ingat kita

kita je kadang kadang lupa Dia

so takyah sedih sedih

Allah kan ada :)

It's hard to change thing or people around me, so I need to change myself before I can change thing or people around me. Before I can make myself happy, I can't make other people to be happy. When someone hurt my feeling, I sad, I cry... but that make me stronger.

see you guys later :)

6:03 PM

Assalamualaikum, hye guys!! I wishing all of you have a great day, precious moment in your life, happiest time with your buddy, wonderful life with family, better day with your enemy & May you guys have a beautiful sunshine & gorgeous moon that will light you up when you are alone.. Find your sunshine & your moon if you don't have it. I have one...

For son & daughter, call your parents, they miss you & do your responsible as their children. For GF & BF, don't cheat your mate..appreciate what you have now or u'll regret someday in your old day,hehe.

For student, all the best for final exam. Make it up till the end & May Allah bless you guys with His Mercy. Amin.. and for everyone out there, good to see you again in here..AinJannah Precious Palace. I miss you guys!! with all the hardship & worries I've been through, it such a good good day I am feeling so relieve right now. Thanks Allah.

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last night, my left hand were bites by unknown insect. I'm not realized it, no pain at all but suddenly my hand got swollen. Not comfortable :(

After an hour, badan rasa panas jer,mcm nak demam. 1 badan rasa mcm gatal2..tak selesa sgt. Risau pun ada jugak.. pe benda la yg gigit aku nih. Aku tak tahan, aku g mandi, alhamdulillah, sejuk skit badan. Asyraf hantar minyak panas, dia sruh sapu kat bengkak tu. Alhamdulillah, pagi ni aku bangun, bengkak dah surut...sakit sikit2 jer.. :)

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okay, now a little bit update about my final exam:

29/4 - NETWORK & IT SECURITY

30/4 - NETWORK ANALYSIS & DESIGN

3/5 - WIDE AREA NETWORK

4/5 - MULTIMEDIA NETWORKING

5/5 - WIRELESS NETWORK & MOBILE COMPUTING

(banyak kan word 'NETWORK' dalam paper final exam aku nih?? Sbb..memang tu la major aku..Bachelor Science Computer in Networking. TERBAEKK!! )

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lately, aku kerap selisih faham dgn my dear..Asyraf. Asyik tegang jer. Actually aku ni ha yg kuat merajuk & suka marah2. I'm sorry dear. Thanks for being so understanding & patient with me. You are the most patient person I ever known,hehehe :)

Dear...

Words are not enough to express how much I love you.. 

You are the other half that makes me feel whole..

You are the sweetest man I know..

You bring nothing but love, peace, joy, and happiness to my soul..

last but not least,

Your smile is so comforting it makes my tears go away.. 
 

rintihanku

Ya Allah,

tubuh ini tubuhMu,

mata ini mataMu,

mulut ini mulutMu,

hati ini hatiMu,

suatu saat nanti...akan kupulangkan kepadaMu..

Ya Allah...perut ini perutMu juga..

perut ini lapar Ya Allah,

perut ini menggengam erat,

mengalir peluh keringat..menahan..

 tubuh ini lemah  Ya Allah,

bibir ini kering Ya Allah,

sehari2an, lena menjadi temanku,

namun..Ya Allah,

aku masih bersyukur kerana masih diberi nikmatMu

udara yg ku hirup utk aku terus hidup,

aku masih diberi kesihatan utk solat,

dan akal utk berfikir, walaupun...lemah..

Ya Allah, jika ini ujian dariMu, 

aku redha Ya Allah..

jika ini balasan di atas dosa2ku,

ampunkan segala dosa2ku Ya Allah...

sesungguhnya Engkau yang Maha Pengasih,

lagi Maha Penyayang..

Amin...Ya Rabbal Alamin...

cintaMu

Ya Allah, sejukkanlah dihati setiap hambaMu yg penuh syukur, limpahkanlah kehidupan hari ini menjadi lebih indah, lebih sihat & lebih membahagiakan. Ya Allah, janganlah Engkau menjadikan diri kami beban bagi diri kami sendiri walaupun hanya sekejap. Sayangilah kami & berkatilah kepada kami dgn kemudahan dlm menjalani hidup ini.

Ya Allah, Engkau yang menyembuhkan setiap luka dengan segenap cintaMu. aku mohon kepadaMu Ya Allah, sembuhkanlah siapapun memiliki luka dihatinya... Amin..

 

thanks Allah

Alhamdulillah, thanks Allah. Thanks for listening to my prayer. Terima kasih di atas rezeki yang Kau berikan kepadaku. Hanya Kau yg Maha Mendengar lagi Maha Mengasihani hambaMu ini. Thanks for giving me strength to face this life, thanks for always be there for me. Ya Allah, sesungguhnya aku sungguh bersyukur di atas segala nikmat yg Kau berikan kepadaku. Terima kasih juga kerana memberi aku kesihatan utk aku meneruskan urusan sehari2an. Ampunkan segala dosa2ku Ya Allah. Berilah aku petunjukMu Ya Allah.

from now on:

no one can hurt me

no one can make me cry

no one can make me angry

no one can make me down

no one can make me frustrated

no one can judge me

no one can blame me

EXCEPT ALLAH

only ALLAH who can hurt me

only ALLAH who can make me cry

only ALLAH who can make me angry

only ALLAH who can make me down

only ALLAH who can make me frustrated

only ALLAH who only can judge me

only ALLAH who can blame me

and only ALLAH can make me H A P P Y

thanks ALLAH, thanks dear..

ternyata, meluahkan apa yang terpendam, satu step yang sangat membantu mendapatkan jawapan & juga menenangkan jiwa. Semalam aku rasa sedih, serba tak kena, runsing, gelisah...aku post lagu-lagu sedih di FB wall.

as usual, my dear Asyraf ask me why i'm behaving like that.

and aku pulak, pantang ditegur,ditanya, memang menangislah. Dari dulu sampai sekarang, aku memang tak reti nak bercerita masalah aku dengan sesiapa,even my parents or sape2 yang close dengan aku. Aku lebih suka pendamkan & selesaikannya sendiri. So even I choose wrong decision, I wouldn't blame anyone except MYSELF. And I'll figure out, what my mistake & why I choose that decision in a first place.

One night with him, luahkan segala yang terpendam, share everything, I'm so relieve and the best part is, I think....He's the one for me..hehe. Meluahkan tu satu hal + menangis bagai nak rak,puas sangat dpt meluahkan apa yang terbuku di hati ni. Dear Asyraf.. you always the best, never disappointed me. You know what apa yang aku suka tentang dia? He's very supportive & He is full of advices & guides. His word make me believe that we own our life. Selain menjadi hambaNya, akur dengan takdirNya, kita juga harus terus berusaha utk jadi lebih baik. 

Bak kata dia 'Biaq kita berubah slow2 drpd xbrubah langsung, and every mistake yang kita buat, kita sedaq & kita muhasabah balik diri kita, awat kita buat lagu tu, apa yang ptut kita buat utk avoid benda tu, sekurang2nya kita sedaq daripada tak sedaq2 entah kemana.'

( dia orang Penang, so mcm tu la jadinya,hihi )

teringat plak ada status one of my BFF kt wall FB dia,berbunyi mcm ni:

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prnh x trlints dhati "sy tau prkara ni tetp dosa wlau nmpk base je di zmn skrg ni" sdih rsa ati ini klau tu cume trlints dhati anda je n anda x wt tindakn utk brubh pe2.anda tau x tu la hidayh yg ALLAH berikn utk anda brubh n sdari ksilpn anda.tp anda x ambil pluang itu.ALLAH pun bleh trik balik hidayh tu.ANDA??adakh nk trus leka dgn dunia n bisikn syaitn smata2?

lagi

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setiap kali kita ditimpa dugaan, kita lalui lah dgn tabah dan redha,,klau kita nk bandingkan dugaan kita hadapi dgn dugaan rasulullah pada zaman dulu, mmg jauh bezanya..ALLAH uji kita kerana ALLAH sayangkan kita kan....YA ALLAH,tabahlah hati hamba-MU ini dalam menempuh segala dugaan yang ku hadapi ini....Amiiin....senyuman di sebalik kesedihan...air mata...

lagi

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Janji Allah kepada hamba-Nya, besar mana pun dosa yang kamu lakukan, lagi besar pengampunan Allah. Selangkah kita menuju Allah, 10 langkah Allah akan datang kepada kita. 

 itulah kita manusia, selalu alpa & lalai. Bila senang kita lupa Dia,bila susah baru la kita nak ingat Dia. Guys...ALLAH itu Maha Mengetahui, Maha Mendengar, Maha Pengampun. Sebagai hambaNya, kita jangan lupakan Dia, susah senang....ingat Dia. Bila senang, jgn lupa mensyukuri apa yang Dia bagi, bila susah, jangan jemu utk minta bantuanNya. Kalo bukan kita yang ubah diri kita sendiri,siapa nak ubahkan...??

Sama2 la kita renungkan...

wahh,,tetiba jer aku wat entry mcm ni kan. Macam gaya bru insaf..hehe. Memang insaf pun, SAYA SAYANG ALLAH.

 

:: Even I'm secretive type, but...if someone know how to get in to me, I will start sharing everything..but..but....just the right one. And this 'the right one' is not just ONE, could be more than ONE ::